“What! You too?”

April 20, 2024 — Laura House

CS Lewis wrote, “Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: ‘What! You too? I thought I was the only one.’”

There is something sweet and deeply comforting about being with others who are experiencing the same thing as you are. Last weekend at the Our Hearts Are Home conference, those who attended experienced this fact again. 

The conference began with an honest and helpful session about grief work, shared by Melanie DeSimone, a bereaved mom and writer of the ‘lifeididntchoose.com” blog that has been a comfort to so many grieving hearts. Next came breakout sessions, small groups, and dinner. While enjoying the meal, parents forged lasting friendships and shared stories of their precious children. The evening concluded with a special message from Dr. Jeff Dickson, Landry’s dad, “Rejoicing, Even in This.” As parents headed to their various hotels, AirBnb’s, and homes, the nervousness of attending had dissipated, replaced by the wonder of being with so many who truly understood. 

On Saturday morning, the day began with an important message for every believer from Jim Beardsley, Katelyn’s dad; “Biblical Lament: Walking the Road of Sorrow to the Throne of the King.” After lunch, and many gourmet cupcakes and Crumbl cookies later that were generously donated, we headed to breakout sessions again. Then came one of my favorite parts of an Our Hearts Are Home conference — mini-gatherings. During these gatherings, parents divided into small groups to share their childrens’ stories, and online participants experienced the session in Zoom rooms. Following the mini-gatherings, the final general session offered words of encouragement from each of the conference team, who were all bereaved parents. 

After our final meal together, the conference concluded with a memorial service to honor and remember our children. We began by singing, “Be Still My Soul”, then as a child’s picture was projected on the screen, his/her parents and family stood to honor them. From those who took their first breath in Heaven, to those who were middle-aged with families of their own, we remembered and honored them. Such precious children. Such precious parents and grandparents.

At the conclusion of the service, we stood in a large circle and prayed together. We thanked the Lord for the gift of the weekend. We thanked the Lord for his mercy and comfort in holding us through our grief and asked for continued strength. And we thanked Him for the ultimate gift to all who believe in Jesus, the gift of eternal life. Because of Jesus we can spend eternity with Him, and with our children. 

We came together as strangers, but we left as friends. This shouldn’t really come as a surprise, should it? God’s plan for the church is that we live in community, that we “mourn with those who mourn”, and bear each other’s burdens. What a beautiful gift!

When Jesus returns, this broken world will be changed, but until then, we will all face trials and sorrow. In the midst of it, we have the unique privilege of entering into other’s pain, pointing them to Jesus, and walking with them through the night.

“What! You too? I thought I was the only one.”

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*Some of the sessions will be available soon on the OHAH YouTube channel.

*If you are a bereaved parent or grandparent, we invite you to join the many online and in-person events offered through Our Hearts Are Home. You can find a full calendar of events here.

*Save the dates! The next OHAH conferences are October 11-12, 2024 in Indianapolis, IN and April 26-27, 2025 in Lynchburg, VA. 



Laura House

Laura House is the co-founder of the Our Hearts Are Home ministry, and Nathan’s mom.

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