A Time for Thanksgiving… A Time for Missing

For so many grieving people, November and December bring an added weight of sorrow from all of the ‘missing’ that happens when memories flood our thoughts. 
 
Nathan’s favorite holiday was Thanksgiving, and he prepared for the feast by fasting the day before so he would have room for more. Savoring the traditional meal, his gratitude showed, and he eagerly polished off a hefty portion of his favorites. But for him, the best part was the pumpkin pie. 
 
Whenever I bake a pie, I think of Nathan as a four-year-old. Gary and I had a weekly Bible study in our home and I on one particular night, I had served pumpkin pie. Knowing there was another pie left over, we both were looking forward to a second slice when our guests left. After saying goodbye to the last person, we headed to the kitchen for another piece and found Nathan sitting on the floor looking stuffed. He had literally eaten the entire pie! He was teased about that incident the rest of his life; and his love of pumpkin pie never waned.
 
If you are missing someone this Thanksgiving, then you know that the emptiness is palpable. We miss their laughs, smiles, hugs, jokes, words, and the list goes on and on. Hopefully you’ll be with people this week who remember your loss, and you can talk about your loved one freely. We’ve found that bringing Nathan up in conversation and sharing something like the stories above, allows others to relax and feel comfortable talking about him. Most friends and family want to be a blessing, but they just don’t realize how special it is when they talk about the one who is in Heaven. Unless they too are grieving, they can’t really know. 
 
As you approach time with others, remind yourself that although you may end up shedding tears of grief from time to time, you are being held by the only One who can truly comfort our broken hearts. You can cry out to Him. You can voice your laments. You can trust Him. 
 
Do you need some strategies for getting through the upcoming events and gatherings? View the recent Our Hearts Are Home webinar here, “Navigating the Holidays.”

Finally, I also want to close this blog by sharing a session from the recent OHAH conference that focused on lament. Learning to lament as you travel this painful journey can be life-changing and life-giving. Enjoy Mark Vroegop’s message here.

Laura House

Laura House is the co-founder of the Our Hearts Are Home ministry, and Nathan’s mom.

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